Husbands, Love Your Wives
Marriage is a divine covenant established by the heavenly Father, designed to reflect His faithful and enduring love. In this sacred bond, the husband is called to love, cherish, and honor his wife as Christ loves the Church: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25).
This kind of love is not merely a romantic feeling but a
self-giving, sacrificial, and enduring commitment that stands firm in both joy
and affliction. A husband who embraces this calling fosters an environment
where love, kindness, and intimacy flourish, even amid life’s challenges.
Why Should a Husband Love and Be
Kind to His Wife?
Husbands, your calling to love your wife is not merely a
societal expectation—it is a sacred mandate given by the heavenly Father. Love
in marriage is not based on fleeting emotions but on a steadfast commitment
that mirrors Christ’s love for the Church. A husband’s love must be
sacrificial, enduring, and nurturing, fostering an environment where trust,
intimacy, and mutual respect thrive.
But why is this love so essential? The Scriptures reveal
that marriage is more than a human partnership—it is a divine reflection of
Christ and His people. The way a husband loves his wife impacts not only their
relationship but also his walk with the heavenly Father. It influences the
spiritual atmosphere of the home, strengthens the bond of unity, and deepens
both emotional and physical intimacy.
Understanding this sacred responsibility, let us explore
three key reasons why a husband must love and cherish his wife according to the
Scriptures.
1. Because Marriage Reflects Christ
and the Church
The marital relationship is a profound reflection of
Christ’s love for His people: “For the husband is the head of the wife, as
Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body”
(Ephesians 5:23).
Just as Christ loved the Church unconditionally, the husband
is to love his wife not only when circumstances are easy but also in times of
difficulty, suffering, and trials. Christ remained faithful to His bride,
enduring the cross for her redemption. Likewise, a husband’s love must remain
steadfast, even when faced with hardships such as financial struggles,
sickness, emotional distress, or misunderstandings.
2. Because Love and Honor Affect His Relationship with the Heavenly Father
The way a husband treats his wife has spiritual consequences.
The Apostle Peter warns: “ You husbands, in the same way, live with your wives
in an understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman; and
show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will
not be hindered” (1 Peter 3:7).
A husband’s spiritual life is directly linked to how he
treats his wife. If he neglects, mistreats, or dishonors her, his prayers will
be hindered. This means that his relationship with the heavenly Father is
affected when he fails to reflect Christ’s love in his marriage.
3. Because Love Strengthens Intimacy and Unity in Marriage
A loving husband nurtures not only emotional and spiritual
unity but also physical intimacy with his wife. The Scriptures affirm the
sacredness of marital intimacy: “The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife,
and likewise also the wife to her husband” (1 Corinthians 7:3).
Physical intimacy is not only a gift but also a means of
expressing love, care, and devotion. A husband’s kindness, tenderness, and
patience foster a healthy and joyful intimate life. Just as Christ draws His
Church to Himself in love, a husband must pursue his wife’s heart with
affection, not just desire. True intimacy is built on trust, emotional
connection, and a deep understanding of one another.
How Should a Husband Love and Be Kind to His Wife?
Loving one’s wife is not merely about good intentions—it
requires deliberate action, daily sacrifice, and unwavering commitment. Love,
in its truest form, is demonstrated in how a husband speaks, serves, and
supports his wife, especially in moments of difficulty.
The Scriptures provide a clear blueprint for Christlike
love, showing husbands how to honor, cherish, and nurture their wives in a way
that reflects the heart of the heavenly Father. Love is more than words; it is
a sacrificial offering, a steadfast presence in affliction, and a foundation
for intimacy, trust, and unity.
So, how can a husband fulfill this sacred calling? The
following principles, drawn from God’s Word, offer practical and spiritual
guidance on what it means to love and be kind to one’s wife.
1. By Loving Sacrificially, Even in Afflictions
True love is tested in suffering. Christ’s love was not
conditional—it endured the afflictions of betrayal, rejection, and the cross.
Likewise, a husband is called to love his wife sacrificially, even when times
are difficult: “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ” (Galatians
6:2).
Whether facing sickness, financial struggles, or emotional
pain, a godly husband remains faithful, patient, and steadfast. He does not
withdraw his affection in hardship but draws closer to his wife, comforting and
uplifting her.
2. By Honoring and Respecting Her in All Aspects
To honor one’s wife is to recognize her worth in the sight
of the heavenly Father. She is not merely a helper but an equal heir of grace: “There
is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free man, there is no male
and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus” (Galatians 3:28).
Honor is expressed through words, actions, and attitudes. A
loving husband speaks gently and respectfully, listens attentively, and values
his wife’s thoughts and feelings. Even in disagreement, he remains calm,
patient, and willing to seek peace.
3. By Leading with Humility and Understanding
Spiritual leadership in marriage is not about control but
about servant-hearted guidance. Christ, the ultimate leader, humbled Himself to
serve others: “The greatest among you shall be your servant” (Matthew 23:11).
A husband leads by example, demonstrating humility, wisdom,
and a deep commitment to his wife’s spiritual growth. He encourages her faith,
supports her ministry, and prays with her, ensuring that their marriage remains
centered on the heavenly Father’s will.
4. By Strengthening Emotional and Physical Intimacy
Marital intimacy is a reflection of oneness, both physically
and emotionally: “The two shall become one flesh; so they are no longer two,
but one flesh” (Mark 10:8).
A husband should be affectionate, attentive, and emotionally
present. Intimacy is not only about physical closeness but also about understanding
and cherishing his wife’s heart. He should create a safe space where she feels
heard, loved, and valued, ensuring that their connection grows deeper over
time.
5. By Remaining Faithful in Love and Commitment
Faithfulness is more than just physical exclusivity—it is emotional
and spiritual devotion. The Scriptures urge husbands to remain steadfast:
“Drink water from your own cistern
And fresh water from your own well” (Proverbs 5:15).
A loving husband guards his heart against temptation, stays
true to his vows, and remains deeply committed to his wife in mind, body, and
spirit.
6. By Praying for and with His Wife
A godly husband lifts his wife in prayer, seeking the
heavenly Father’s blessing and guidance: “For where two or three have gathered
together in My name, I am there in their midst” (Matthew 18:20).
Praying together strengthens spiritual intimacy and deepens
their bond. A husband who prays for his wife demonstrates that he is her
spiritual covering, interceding for her needs and seeking the heavenly Father’s
favor upon their marriage.
Moreover, worshipping together and partaking in Holy
Communion with a pure conscience affirms their unity in Christ. The Apostle
Paul exhorts believers to approach the Lord’s Table with reverence and
self-examination: “But a man must test himself, and in so doing he is to eat of
the bread and drink of the cup” (1 Corinthians 11:28).
A husband and wife who walk in love, forgiveness, and
spiritual harmony partake of the Lord’s Supper in a way that honors Christ and
strengthens their oneness as a couple in Him. Worshiping side by side and
sharing in the Eucharist is an expression of their covenant—not only with one
another but with Christ Himself.
Thus, a husband must not only pray for and with his wife but
also strive to maintain a pure heart, a spirit of unity, and a shared devotion
to the Lord, ensuring that their marriage is deeply rooted in faith and
nourished by His grace.
Conclusion: A Reflection of Christ’s Love
The love of a husband is not just an obligation—it is a
divine calling. Just as Christ remains faithful to His bride, the Church, a
husband is to remain steadfast in love through both joy and suffering, strength
and weakness. He is to nurture intimacy, honor, and kindness, leading his wife
with a servant’s heart and ensuring that their home is a reflection of grace,
peace, and Christ-centered love.
Paul’s words serve as a guiding principle for every husband:
“So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who
loves his own wife loves himself” (Ephesians 5:28).
May every husband embrace this holy calling, ensuring that
his marriage becomes a testimony of the heavenly Father’s love—faithful,
enduring, and life-giving.
For Further Reading:
If you want to explore more about God’s design for marriage
and family life, I invite you to read my book, “The Christian Family: A
Biblical Perspective.” This book delves deeper into the biblical foundation
of family life, emphasizing the sacred roles of husbands, wives, and children
within God’s divine order. It offers practical guidance and scriptural wisdom
on building a Christ-centered home filled with love, unity, and faith.
📖 Available now on
Amazon: “The Christian Family: A Biblical Perspective”
May the heavenly Father bless your marriage and home as you
seek to live according to His will.
Fr. Abraam Sleman
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#EucharisticLife, #WorshipTogether
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