Husbands, Love Your Wives


Marriage is a divine covenant established by the heavenly Father, designed to reflect His faithful and enduring love. In this sacred bond, the husband is called to love, cherish, and honor his wife as Christ loves the Church: “Husbands, love your wives, just as Christ also loved the church and gave Himself up for her” (Ephesians 5:25).

This kind of love is not merely a romantic feeling but a self-giving, sacrificial, and enduring commitment that stands firm in both joy and affliction. A husband who embraces this calling fosters an environment where love, kindness, and intimacy flourish, even amid life’s challenges. 

 Why Should a Husband Love and Be Kind to His Wife? 

Husbands, your calling to love your wife is not merely a societal expectation—it is a sacred mandate given by the heavenly Father. Love in marriage is not based on fleeting emotions but on a steadfast commitment that mirrors Christ’s love for the Church. A husband’s love must be sacrificial, enduring, and nurturing, fostering an environment where trust, intimacy, and mutual respect thrive.

But why is this love so essential? The Scriptures reveal that marriage is more than a human partnership—it is a divine reflection of Christ and His people. The way a husband loves his wife impacts not only their relationship but also his walk with the heavenly Father. It influences the spiritual atmosphere of the home, strengthens the bond of unity, and deepens both emotional and physical intimacy.

Understanding this sacred responsibility, let us explore three key reasons why a husband must love and cherish his wife according to the Scriptures.

 1. Because Marriage Reflects Christ and the Church 

The marital relationship is a profound reflection of Christ’s love for His people: “For the husband is the head of the wife, as Christ also is the head of the church, He Himself being the Savior of the body” (Ephesians 5:23). 

Just as Christ loved the Church unconditionally, the husband is to love his wife not only when circumstances are easy but also in times of difficulty, suffering, and trials. Christ remained faithful to His bride, enduring the cross for her redemption. Likewise, a husband’s love must remain steadfast, even when faced with hardships such as financial struggles, sickness, emotional distress, or misunderstandings. 

2. Because Love and Honor Affect His Relationship with the Heavenly Father 

The way a husband treats his wife has spiritual consequences. The Apostle Peter warns: “ You husbands, in the same way, live with your wives in an understanding way, as with a weaker vessel, since she is a woman; and show her honor as a fellow heir of the grace of life, so that your prayers will not be hindered” (1 Peter 3:7). 

A husband’s spiritual life is directly linked to how he treats his wife. If he neglects, mistreats, or dishonors her, his prayers will be hindered. This means that his relationship with the heavenly Father is affected when he fails to reflect Christ’s love in his marriage. 

3. Because Love Strengthens Intimacy and Unity in Marriage 

A loving husband nurtures not only emotional and spiritual unity but also physical intimacy with his wife. The Scriptures affirm the sacredness of marital intimacy: “The husband must fulfill his duty to his wife, and likewise also the wife to her husband” (1 Corinthians 7:3). 

Physical intimacy is not only a gift but also a means of expressing love, care, and devotion. A husband’s kindness, tenderness, and patience foster a healthy and joyful intimate life. Just as Christ draws His Church to Himself in love, a husband must pursue his wife’s heart with affection, not just desire. True intimacy is built on trust, emotional connection, and a deep understanding of one another. 

How Should a Husband Love and Be Kind to His Wife? 

Loving one’s wife is not merely about good intentions—it requires deliberate action, daily sacrifice, and unwavering commitment. Love, in its truest form, is demonstrated in how a husband speaks, serves, and supports his wife, especially in moments of difficulty.

The Scriptures provide a clear blueprint for Christlike love, showing husbands how to honor, cherish, and nurture their wives in a way that reflects the heart of the heavenly Father. Love is more than words; it is a sacrificial offering, a steadfast presence in affliction, and a foundation for intimacy, trust, and unity.

So, how can a husband fulfill this sacred calling? The following principles, drawn from God’s Word, offer practical and spiritual guidance on what it means to love and be kind to one’s wife.

1. By Loving Sacrificially, Even in Afflictions 

True love is tested in suffering. Christ’s love was not conditional—it endured the afflictions of betrayal, rejection, and the cross. Likewise, a husband is called to love his wife sacrificially, even when times are difficult: “Bear one another’s burdens, and so fulfill the law of Christ” (Galatians 6:2). 

Whether facing sickness, financial struggles, or emotional pain, a godly husband remains faithful, patient, and steadfast. He does not withdraw his affection in hardship but draws closer to his wife, comforting and uplifting her. 

2. By Honoring and Respecting Her in All Aspects 

To honor one’s wife is to recognize her worth in the sight of the heavenly Father. She is not merely a helper but an equal heir of grace: “There is neither Jew nor Greek, there is neither slave nor free man, there is no male and female, for you are all one in Christ Jesus” (Galatians 3:28).

Honor is expressed through words, actions, and attitudes. A loving husband speaks gently and respectfully, listens attentively, and values his wife’s thoughts and feelings. Even in disagreement, he remains calm, patient, and willing to seek peace. 

3. By Leading with Humility and Understanding 

Spiritual leadership in marriage is not about control but about servant-hearted guidance. Christ, the ultimate leader, humbled Himself to serve others: “The greatest among you shall be your servant” (Matthew 23:11). 

A husband leads by example, demonstrating humility, wisdom, and a deep commitment to his wife’s spiritual growth. He encourages her faith, supports her ministry, and prays with her, ensuring that their marriage remains centered on the heavenly Father’s will. 

4. By Strengthening Emotional and Physical Intimacy 

Marital intimacy is a reflection of oneness, both physically and emotionally: “The two shall become one flesh; so they are no longer two, but one flesh” (Mark 10:8).

A husband should be affectionate, attentive, and emotionally present. Intimacy is not only about physical closeness but also about understanding and cherishing his wife’s heart. He should create a safe space where she feels heard, loved, and valued, ensuring that their connection grows deeper over time. 

5. By Remaining Faithful in Love and Commitment 

Faithfulness is more than just physical exclusivity—it is emotional and spiritual devotion. The Scriptures urge husbands to remain steadfast:

“Drink water from your own cistern

And fresh water from your own well” (Proverbs 5:15).

A loving husband guards his heart against temptation, stays true to his vows, and remains deeply committed to his wife in mind, body, and spirit. 

 6. By Praying for and with His Wife 

A godly husband lifts his wife in prayer, seeking the heavenly Father’s blessing and guidance: “For where two or three have gathered together in My name, I am there in their midst” (Matthew 18:20).

Praying together strengthens spiritual intimacy and deepens their bond. A husband who prays for his wife demonstrates that he is her spiritual covering, interceding for her needs and seeking the heavenly Father’s favor upon their marriage. 

Moreover, worshipping together and partaking in Holy Communion with a pure conscience affirms their unity in Christ. The Apostle Paul exhorts believers to approach the Lord’s Table with reverence and self-examination: “But a man must test himself, and in so doing he is to eat of the bread and drink of the cup” (1 Corinthians 11:28). 

A husband and wife who walk in love, forgiveness, and spiritual harmony partake of the Lord’s Supper in a way that honors Christ and strengthens their oneness as a couple in Him. Worshiping side by side and sharing in the Eucharist is an expression of their covenant—not only with one another but with Christ Himself. 

Thus, a husband must not only pray for and with his wife but also strive to maintain a pure heart, a spirit of unity, and a shared devotion to the Lord, ensuring that their marriage is deeply rooted in faith and nourished by His grace.

Conclusion: A Reflection of Christ’s Love 

The love of a husband is not just an obligation—it is a divine calling. Just as Christ remains faithful to His bride, the Church, a husband is to remain steadfast in love through both joy and suffering, strength and weakness. He is to nurture intimacy, honor, and kindness, leading his wife with a servant’s heart and ensuring that their home is a reflection of grace, peace, and Christ-centered love. 

Paul’s words serve as a guiding principle for every husband: “So husbands ought also to love their own wives as their own bodies. He who loves his own wife loves himself” (Ephesians 5:28).

May every husband embrace this holy calling, ensuring that his marriage becomes a testimony of the heavenly Father’s love—faithful, enduring, and life-giving.

For Further Reading:

If you want to explore more about God’s design for marriage and family life, I invite you to read my book, “The Christian Family: A Biblical Perspective.” This book delves deeper into the biblical foundation of family life, emphasizing the sacred roles of husbands, wives, and children within God’s divine order. It offers practical guidance and scriptural wisdom on building a Christ-centered home filled with love, unity, and faith.

📖 Available now on Amazon: “The Christian Family: A Biblical Perspective”

May the heavenly Father bless your marriage and home as you seek to live according to His will.

Fr. Abraam Sleman

frsleman@CopticChurch.net

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